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Who am I? If u wanna know, read these scribbles of mine.
*We shouldn't live life as if nothing is a miracle but rather live life as though everything is a miracle, and our life itself will be a miracle.*
Through God's sweet miracles in my life, may I be someone else's miracle.

Its been a long year...

Saturday, 9th April 2011, 1.42pm

I suddenly decided to visit my own blog after having neglected it for almost half a year.
My blog used to be a space where I attempted to jot down the happenings around me and photos of my life. Revisiting my previous posts again after so long made me realize how important a role my blog had played in my life. Reading the posts I've written before reminded me of the funny moments I've had in my life and the memories I cherish with the people around me. It was kinda refreshing to read them once again after so long.

I created my blog when I first started college in KL. I created it that time just coz blogs were popular at that time and it was a way I could keep my friends and family updated about my life away from home. As I look through my old posts, I realize how fast time has passed, how much I have grown and changed and how my life is now so different.

I used to be quite passionate about my blog. I would think of interesting posts to post up and photos to take around me to update my blog. But I could see the signs of neglect that were slowly building up where I posted less and less frequently and my posts becoming just random stuff unrelated to my life. Where did the initial passion disappear to?

I still love reading people's blogs and I think its a great way to get to know the personality of someone through their writings and their life. Maybe I should update my blog more often. Not sure whether anyone even reads it anymore but I know it would be great to come back and read my blog posts again after 10 years and see how much I have changed now till then. Hopefully I will be more motivated and hardworking in updating it now... :)

LOVE by Jaeson Ma feat. Bruno Mars

Heard this song that was posted through Kelvin's tumblr this morning and just thought it was really beautiful. The lyrics are somewhat hauntingly beautiful. The tune sang by Bruno Mars is quite catchy and I kept listening to it over and over again.

Thought maybe I should post up the lyrics as well...

Lyrics:

Verse 1
Now Hollywood wants to make you think they know what love is.
But I'm a tell you what true love is.
Love is not what you see in the movies. Its not the ecstasy, its not what you see in that scene, you know what I mean?
I'm telling you right now, true love is sacrifice. Love is thinking about others before you think about yourself, love is selfless not selfish.
Love is God and God is love.
Love is when you lay down your life for another, whether for your brother, your mother, your father or your sister, its even laying down your life for your enemies, that's unthinkable, but think about that. Love is true. Think.


Chorus:
I'll put you in front of me
So everybody can see
My love, this is my love
I know that I'll be alright
As long as you are my guide
My love, this is my love


Verse 2
Love is patient, love is kind.
It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.
It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.
Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.
It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, it always perseveres.
Love never fails. Love is everlasting, its eternal, it goes on and on, it goes beyond time, love is the only thing that will last when you die, but ask the question why? Do you have love?


Chorus


Verse 3
There is no greater love than this than he who lays down his life for his friends. Now are you willing to lay down your life for your friends?
You're probably willing to lay down your life for your mother, your father, or your best friends, but are you willing to lay down your life for even those that hate you?
I'm going to tell you who did that, the definition of love is Jesus Christ. He is love.
The nails in his hands, the thorns in his brow, hanging on a cross for your sin my sins, that is LOVE he died for you and me while we still hated him, that is love.
God is true love, and if you don't know this love, now is the time to know, perfect love.


Chorus 

The Egg by Andy Weir

Sunday, 11 July 2010, 12.33 am

Recently read a short story someone posted on facebook which I thought was quite an interesting read, so thought maybe I shall blog about it and share it:



The Egg

You were on your way home when you died.

It was a car accident. Nothing particularly remarkable, but fatal nonetheless. You left behind a wife and two children. It was a painless death. The EMTs tried their best to save you, but to no avail. Your body was so utterly shattered you were better off, trust me.
And that's when you met me.

"What… what happened?" You asked. "Where am I?"
 
"You died," I said, matter-of-factly. No point in mincing words.
 
"There was a… a truck and it was skidding…"
 
"Yup," I said.
 
"I… I died?"
 
"Yup. But don't feel bad about it. Everyone dies," I said.
You looked around. There was nothingness. Just you and me. "What is this place?" You asked. "Is this the afterlife?"
 
"More or less," I said.
 
"Are you god?" You asked.
 
"Yup," I replied. "I'm God."
 
"My kids… my wife," you said.
 
"What about them?"
 
"Will they be all right?"
 
"That's what I like to see," I said. "You just died and your main concern is for your family. That's good stuff right there."
You looked at me with fascination. To you, I didn't look like God. I just looked like some man. Or possibly a woman. Some vague authority figure, maybe. More of a grammar school teacher than the almighty.
 
"Don't worry," I said. "They'll be fine. Your kids will remember you as perfect in every way. They didn't have time to grow contempt for you. You wife will cry on the outside, but will be secretly relieved. To be fair, your marriage was falling apart. If it's any consolation, she'll feel very guilty for feeling relieved."
 
"Oh," you said. "So what happens now? Do I go to heaven or hell or something?"
 
"Neither," I said. "You'll be reincarnated."
 
"Ah," you said. "So the Hindus were right,"
 
"All religions are right in their own way," I said. "Walk with me."
You followed along as we strode through the void. "Where are we going?"
 
"Nowhere in particular," I said. "It's just nice to walk while we talk."
 
"So what's the point, then?" You asked. "When I get reborn, I'll just be a blank slate, right? A baby. So all my experiences and everything I did in this life won't matter."
 
"Not so!" I said. "You have within you all the knowledge and experiences of all your past lives. You just don't remember them right now."
 
I stopped walking and took you by the shoulders. 
"Your soul is more magnificent, beautiful, and gigantic than you can possibly imagine. A human mind can only contain a tiny fraction of what you are. It's like sticking your finger in a glass of water to see if it's hot or cold. You put a tiny part of yourself into the vessel, and when you bring it back out, you've gained all the experiences it had.
 
"You've been in a human for the last 48 years, so you haven't stretched out yet and felt the rest of your immense consciousness. If we hung out here for long enough, you'd start remembering everything. But there's no point to doing that between each life."
 
"How many times have I been reincarnated, then?"
 
"Oh lots. Lots and lots. An in to lots of different lives." I said. 

"This time around, you'll be a Chinese peasant girl in 540 AD."
 
"Wait, what?" You stammered. "You're sending me back in time?"
 
"Well, I guess technically. Time, as you know it, only exists in your universe. Things are different where I come from."
 
"Where you come from?" You said.
 
"Oh sure," I explained "I come from somewhere. Somewhere else. And there are others like me. I know you'll want to know what it's like there, but honestly you wouldn't understand."
 
"Oh," you said, a little let down. "But wait. If I get reincarnated to other places in time, I could have interacted with myself at some point."
 
"Sure. Happens all the time. And with both lives only aware of their own lifespan you don't even know it's happening."
 
"So what's the point of it all?"
 
"Seriously?" I asked. "Seriously? You're asking me for the meaning of life? Isn't that a little stereotypical?"
 
"Well it's a reasonable question," you persisted.
I looked you in the eye. "The meaning of life, the reason I made this whole universe, is for you to mature."
 
"You mean mankind? You want us to mature?"
 
"No, just you. I made this whole universe for you. With each new life you grow and mature and become a larger and greater intellect."
 
"Just me? What about everyone else?"
 
"There is no one else," I said. "In this universe, there's just you and me."
 
You stared blankly at me. "But all the people on earth…"
 
"All you. Different incarnations of you."
 
"Wait. I'm everyone!?"
 
"Now you're getting it," I said, with a congratulatory slap on the back.
 
"I'm every human being who ever lived?"
 
"Or who will ever live, yes."
 
"I'm Abraham Lincoln?"
 
"And you're John Wilkes Booth, too," I added.
 
"I'm Hitler?" You said, appalled.
 
"And you're the millions he killed."
 
"I'm Jesus?"
 
"And you're everyone who followed him."
You fell silent.
 
"Every time you victimized someone," I said, "you were victimizing yourself. Every act of kindness you've done, you've done to yourself. Every happy and sad moment ever experienced by any human was, or will be, experienced by you."
 
You thought for a long time.
 
"Why?" You asked me. "Why do all this?"
 
"Because someday, you will become like me. Because that's what you are. You're one of my kind. You're my child."
 
"Whoa," you said, incredulous. "You mean I'm a god?"
 
"No. Not yet. You're a fetus. You're still growing. Once you've lived every human life throughout all time, you will have grown enough to be born."
 
"So the whole universe," you said, "it's just…"
 
"An egg." I answered. "Now it's time for you to move on to your next life."
 
And I sent you on your way.

What if you were blind?

Sunday, 20 June 2010, 6.57 pm

 
 

A short story. A blind boy sat on the steps of a building with a hat by his feet. He held up a sign which said: 'I am blind, please help.' There were only a few coins in the hat. A man was walking by. He took a few coins from his pocket and dropped them into the hat. He then took the sign, turned it around, and wrote some words. He put the sign back so that everyone who walked by would see the new words. Soon the hat began to fill up. A lot more people were giving money to the blind boy. That afternoon the man who had changed the sign came to see how things were. The boy recognized his footsteps and asked, 'Were you the one who changed my sign this morning? What did you write?'

The man said, 'I only wrote the truth. I said what you said but in a different way.' What he had written was: 'Today is a beautiful day and I cannot see it.' 

Do you think the first sign and the second sign were saying the same thing?Of course both signs told people the boy was blind.But the first sign simply said the boy was blind. The second sign told people they were so lucky that they were not blind.


This morning's sermon by Aunty Lyn titled "Two Blind Men" made me start to think and imagine...what would my life be like if I were blind? Imagine a world without colours, without anything but darkness...

We go through our lives pursuing things like money, a successful career, fame...Sometimes we fail to see how lucky we are and how blessed we are to even have the simple things that make our lives truly complete. Sometimes we take for granted little things God has blessed us with, things such as our sight. Only when we lose those two little eyes of ours will we realize the immense value of the two little diamonds we've lost.

Be thankful for what you have. The most beautiful thing is to see a person smiling. And even more beautiful is, knowing that you are the reason behind it.

What is your deepest fear?

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.

It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us.
We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant,
gorgeous, handsome, talented and fabulous?

Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God.

Your playing small does not serve the world.
There is nothing enlightened about shrinking
so that other people won't feel insecure around you.
We are all meant to shine, as children do.

We were born to make manifest the glory of God within us.
It is not just in some; it is in everyone.

And, as we let our own light shine, we consciously give
other people permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our fear,
our presence automatically liberates others." 
~A Return to Love, Marianne Williamson

I just watched the movie "Coach Carter" which quotes part of this poem which I think is quite inspirational.
Each of us are created unique in God's eyes. Yet we tend to generalize and conform ourselves to the society. 

People tend to look at their inadequacies, to look at their weaknesses, and think of themselves as nothing. But the opposite is true. When you are able to resist temptation, peer pressure, and resist the standards the world has set, that u need to be beautiful, rich or talented to be "someone", you will realize that you are more powerful than you realize. You don't crave for things many people go after, you are not affected by anything, even in utter chaos, you keep your cool. Even the money which is considered as one of the most powerful things to many people, it will not have any power over you.

We quickly blame the unknowable and the dark within ourselves, as well as the views of others, for our failure to see and act upon the good in ourselves; yet, that dark unknowableness, as well as the views of others, really has no more bearing on our opinion of ourselves than what we give it. 

Don't ask "Who am I to be beautiful?" Ask, "Who am I not to be?" If you undervalue your worth, so will others. The value of your worth is yours, and yours alone, to decide. If you know you are an ugly person, then choose to know that you are beautiful. If you allow yourself to see your beauty, then the ugliness is simply those who can't see how beautiful you really are. Your perspective is your own. Tell yourself how you see yourself long enough and you will believe it and that is who you will become. 

There are times where we find an opportunity to step up. To come out of our comfortable shell we've been in and to make a difference, make a change. Whether it be realizing a dream or letting your natural talents show. There are seasons of bold opportunities and yet sometimes we are afraid to step up. There is a quote I read which says " The Lord wouldn't give you a dream without the ability to make it come true." Whether big or small, any dream has the potential to bring forth a life of faith, for it takes God to fulfill a dream. We don't need faith for what is possible, but for what is impossible. Sometimes we need to take that step of faith instead of playing small. 

God has planted that seed of uniqueness in each and everyone of us. We are all children of God and He has made and shaped us each individually. And we should have faith that God has given each of us that power within us to make those choices in our life, to live to our fullest potential or let the fear in our lives take control of us.